島國的交通臨檢

上禮拜我騎著租來的摩托車，島上早有耳聞警察很黑，會以莫名其妙的原因開罰像是騎車方向不明之類，但其實錢都到自己的口袋裏。

Last week I rented a scooter in this island. I have heard that the police is really corrupted so they would raise unreasonable charges (like lost of sense of direction while driving, or invent some documents which never existed) to foreign drivers, and the money goes to their pockets of course.

我們一路往火山騎去，結果在半路上就遇到了警察，也跟聽來的傳言一樣，只攔外國人而已。講英文的警察，開始拿出一張從不存在的文件說，

「雖然我們沒有這文件，但我可以用超速來把這件事處理掉。你們有兩個選擇......」但兩個選擇聽起來一模一樣，就是要我們當場繳錢就是，在他的破英文下，我模糊聽到了一個金額（最後證實是2500000，約台幣750）

On the way to the volcano, we were actually stopped by the police who blocked the road. Only foreigners, same as said. Later, the broken English speaking cop started to examine our driving documents and quickly invented a new document which never existed. Well, he began the game...

"You are illegal driving but I can manage to charge you as speeding for the first time punishment. You have two options here..." Of course these two options sounds so identical so there is the only one, bribe him. IDR250000.

接著他把責任交給另一個負責收錢的鬍子男，他拿出一本罰單（我想那應該也是黑帳，不存在的假文件）開始說:「250000, 請，然後在這簽名。」Game on. 反正剛剛也只聽到一個模糊的數字，就從50000開始吧。

「咦....？ 我不懂，剛剛他說五萬耶...」我開始裝傻。

「250000，我可以罰你到上限兩百萬，你想被罰兩百萬嗎？！」鬍子指著罰單上的25萬。

「咦...但是他說五萬元啊...」這場遊戲看來要一回才會停止。接著我們就在他發怒我裝傻間，他呼叫英語警察過來。

Later he handed over to another cop with moustache who doesn't speak English well. He took out a book for registering the fine (looks very official, but it definitely just looks like a official book). Then he said, "250,000, please (take out your money), and sign here". It was so game on, no matter what, I merely understand anything when he explained, I'd start from something low.

"Mm...? Is it 50000?" I pretend I was surprised by what he proposed.

"No, 250000. I can fine you 2 million. Do you want to pay 2 million IDR?" He was pointing at another number on the book.

"But...he said (he never said) it is 50000..." I keep my act. So there were back and forth. He insisted, furious and I pretend I don't know. Finally moustache called the English speaking back.

總之我讓他有多解釋2次之間，開始尋找新的策略，因為250000的確是這兩人想要的價。接著剩下鬍子警察，我開始訓找罰單上最低的金額，100000開始盧。

「這裏有100000的數字耶，為什麼？」

「250000，你這個。」

「可不可以100000啦...？」

「可不可以100000？」

亂了十分鐘，最後我們以100000成交，台幣300換到一張沒有的廢紙（據鬍子說什麼兩週報平安，最好是）。

公路之旅重新上路。

Because I pretended that I didn't understand what he was explaining the 250000, I made him explain twice so I can come up with my next move. Then surely they want 250000 from us. Later there was only the moustache cop, I started to look for lower number on the fine book.

"There is 100000, why am I not 100000?" I asked.

"No, you are 250000, but I can ask 2 million." He was still so greedy.

"Mm??? ...there is 100000, why we 250000?" "Can we pay 100000?" "How about 100000?"

Anyway, we wasted just 10 mins to get the deal for 100,000, equal to 8 euro for getting away this trouble. 

Later we were back on the road.